I wish people understood the power in severing ties when they’re no longer aligned with the people in their lives. People-possession is dangerous. There are a gazillion people on the planet and there’s nobody—not a single person—who you can’t happily live without.
Having ended many relationships (romantic, business, with friends, and yes, even with relatives) upon realizing that continuing as we were was not healthy for me, I’ve been better off every time!
Breakups don’t have to be hostile and you should develop the skills to move on. In fact, you should approach every relationship in the same way, always keeping this at the forefront of your mind:
Reason. Season. Lifetime.
As a Grown woman, I’ve never returned to a romantic relationship (they ended for good reasons and I don’t allow myself to forget why they ended). I’ve rarely done business again with business partners after a deal has gone south (except in cases where it was not the fault of either party). I don’t revisit friendships that end because I’m okay when we grow in different directions and there are a gazillion other friendships to make that will bring me a gazillion other experiences (although I do still have a handful of childhood friends whom I cherish). And although I always acknowledge relatives, I am very clear that not all relatives are family!
Most relationships you have will be for a reason.
Fewer for a season.
And less than you ever imagined, for a lifetime.
When you realize that the reason you’re alive is to become more of yourself every day, then your view of life’s experiences will change.
You’ll begin to accept what is, embrace whatever life brings and know that every challenge is purposeful and you’re built to endure it. But be sure that the opposite is true too: If you don’t realize that the reason you’re alive is to become more of yourself every day, you’ll try to hold onto yesterday and your view of life’s experiences will not change. You will not accept what is; instead, you’ll continue to resist it. You won’t embrace whatever life brings; you’ll cry woe is me. You won’t ever know that every challenge is purposeful, nor will you ever build resilience to endure challenges; instead you’ll cave.
You’re not here to be defined by the experiences you choose to have. You’re here to be refined by how you handle the experiences life chooses to give you—big difference.
Life is an evolution. Change is Inevitable. Decide to change with things that change around you and to make changes in your life when things—including relationships—no longer serve you. Make your Next Decision Better.
That’s living in the Grown Zone! Here we GROW…Grown IS Sexy!
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