One of our primary motivations for writing our book, Loving In The Grown Zone: A No-Nonsense Guide to Making Healthy Decisions in the Quest for Loving, Romantic Relationships of Honor, Esteem and Respect, is to provide a guide to loving safely, before engaging in physical, sexual, emotional and/or financial intimacy. While we also aim to help our readers to either renegotiate the terms of or end unhealthy relationships, our mission is largely a preventive one. As we often say, we teach you to learn from past drama, resolve present drama and avoid future drama.
Well, if you’ve taken the principles of The Grown Zone to heart and are applying them to your life, you are likely either in a healthy relationship or well on your way to establishing one. A great book to keep you on the right track (one which echoes many of the lessons of Loving In The Grown Zone) is People Tools for Love and Relationships: The Journey from Me to Us (SelectBooks) by real-estate entrepreneur, publisher, editor and author Alan C. Fox. The third book of his People Tools series (following People Tools: 54 Strategies for Building Relationships, Creating Joy, and Embracing Prosperity and People Tools for Business: 50 Strategies for Building Success, Creating Wealth, and Finding Happiness), People Tools for Love and Relationships is a great edition to the Grown Zone Book Shelf, drawing from Fox’s “many years of experience in close relationships, including three marriages and raising six children, two step-children, one foster child, as well as many friendships and business relationships.”
Now, if you’re still living an adult-and-messy lifestyle, you may not be ready for or even appreciate the lessons and insight Fox shares in this book. (You should read, or re-read, Loving In The Grown Zone first.) However, if you have established a Grown, healthy, self-loving lifestyle as a single person, People Tools for Love and Relationships is an excellent guide to establishing and maintaining a loving, enriching relationship that will stand the test of time, with no more trial and error than absolutely necessary for your personal growth. You can read Fox’s book in the order each chapter is written, or you can cherry pick and jump around to the topics which appeal to you most. If you decide to start with the latter option, I strongly recommend “The Key Is You”, “How to Be the Right Person”, “Ask And Be Thankful”, and “Belt Buckle, Revisited.”
Written with tenderness, honesty, and self-deprecating wit, People Tools for Love and Relationships has much in common with Loving In The Grown Zone, including brief chapters that are as easy-to-read (and re-read) as they are insightful and stimulating. (Fox’s book even has it’s own version of H.E.R.—”Happiness = Expectations – Reality”—which greatly complements our standard of Honor, Esteem and Respect.) They are a great pair of books to purchase together, as both will change the way you think about relationships, and provide excellent guidelines to help you (along with a qualified and willing partner) establish, cultivate and preserve the treasure of healthy love.
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