self love

/Tag:self love

Why Are The Most Loving People Treated So Poorly In Relationships?

You attract what you are. This frequently shared piece of life and relationship advice is often difficult for people who repeatedly experience mistreatment in relationships to buy into. Based on their experiences, they have come to believe the following: The more kind, loyal and loving you are, the more attractive you become to those who are the opposite—mean, unfaithful, abusive and dishonest. RELATED: 3 Things Keeping You From The Healthy [...]

Grown Zone Book Shelf: The C-Word, Celibacy, My 28-Year Journey

A Grown woman is a healthy, whole, and content person, who chooses life alone over anything less than loving, loyal and respectful treatment in a relationship with another person. She sets a high standard based on self-love, and won’t consider anyone who does not rise to it.... In the meantime, she is focused on her own growth and personal development, not dictated to by a biological clock nor passing months [...]

7 More Things To Know Before You Open Your Legs, Checkbook, Heart or Home

In the Grown Zone, we constantly remind you to make access to your body (sex and powers of procreation), money (financial stability), home (personal safety) and heart (emotional security), the last things you give up to get a relationship or keep one going. Unfortunately, we are taught the opposite—to surrender one, more or all of these things to either prove our love or to secure love from others. This “conventional [...]

4 Reasons We Are Convinced That We’re Unlovable

One of the key factors in your inability to find and maintain healthy relationships are the haunting beliefs, even if unspoken, that you are unworthy or undeserving of love. Once you adopt these beliefs (even if unconsciously), you sabotage your ability to prepare for, recognize, attract and engage in healthy relationships of honor, esteem and respect. It's important to understand how we often use facts as justification for adopting false and self-sabotaging beliefs. [...]

Is A Mindset of Limited Options Keeping You From The Relationship You Deserve?

To all my single sisters, question for you... Would you rather have a wealthy man who provides everything for you, ensures that you never want for anything, you travel regularly, and are able to pursue your dreams because he doesn't mind supporting them financially, but he admits and you are aware that he sleeps with other woman on occasion (with protection)? OR Would you rather be involved with a man [...]

My Story: The High Price of Foregoing Relationship Education

Would you invest, say, $10,000 on a program of relationship education to avoid more than $100,000 in expenses and other costs resulting from poor relationship choices? Today, that’s a no-brainer for me: Absolutely, I would. But that was not always the case. For most of my adult life, like most people, I was firmly committed to the follow-your-heart, learn-by-experience, anything-for-love approach to relationships. By my 40th birthday, the results of [...]

Esteemable Goals: Making New Year’s Resolutions That Matter to You

Each New Year, people commit (or recommit) to wishes, dreams and desires for their lives, also known as resolutions. Unfortunately, breaking resolutions is as much a tradition as making them. However, making and breaking promises, especially to yourself, is not Grown, because it is unhealthy; it diminishes your love and esteem for self. Your capacity to make and keep healthy commitments to yourself is a major sign of being truly [...]

Get Better At Severing Ties: Amicable Breakups

I wish people understood the power in severing ties when they’re no longer aligned with the people in their lives.  People-possession is dangerous. There are a gazillion people on the planet and there’s nobody—not a single person—who you can’t happily live without. RELATED: Your Relationship Is Over. Now What? Having ended many relationships (romantic, business, with friends, and yes, even with relatives) upon realizing that continuing as we were was not [...]

3 Acts Of Holiday Season Foolery You Need To Avoid

Most adult-and-messy choices are a result of making decisions for a reason or a season that result in unintended lifetime consequences. This truth is even more evident during the holiday season, when we make exceptions for unhealthy relationship choices and poor treatment that we’d never tolerate during the rest of the year. The result: unhealthy, holiday foolery, the kind you need to fortify yourself against in order to enjoy the [...]

Would You Let A 5-Year-Old Drive? Too Many People Do

I want to share an encounter with you, and through it, hopefully, you’ll be able to have an inner-child revelation of your own and stop letting him/her drive your life! I met an absolutely gorgeous, educated, delightful lady recently at the DMV who rejected every compliment I gave her. After our encounter (which lasted over an hour) and before we parted ways with tears in her eyes, she said, “I [...]