Adults are messy enough when it comes to love, sex and relationships. But for real rachetness and foolery, add money to the mix. Too many people pay dearly both emotionally and financially because they insist on treating love as a form of currency, like the yen or Euro, with an exchange rate convertible to U.S. dollars. For examples of the relationship disasters that result, just look at television court shows like Judge Judy (one of our favorites for observing adult-and-messy thinking in a controlled environment). For love, people will make totally not Grown money decisions, including:
Spending lavishly on gifts, travel and food (with money that suddenly become “loans” after the break-up).
Paying the mortgage, rent, utilities and other bills of healthy, able-bodied, yet unemployed adults (even when those paying have their own children to feed).
Co-signing on credit cards and mobile phone service for people who can’t get them because of horrible credit and/or a checkered employment history. (Meaning the payer is taking a financial risk that a major bank or national cell phone provider wouldn’t take).
Buying or giving unfettered access to cars, including paying for insurance and even gas, for another adult (who may or may not have a license) to drive.
Posting bail and paying the outstanding balance on child-support owed (for the children of another woman) to get a person out of jail.
One of our most basic human needs is to be loved and, unfortunately, some people try to buy it. There are many negative relationship consequences as a result. Besides episodes of clothes bleaching and car keying, here are just a couple: