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I could have been the poster child for unhealthy relationships and behaviors. Now, armed with the knowledge gained from Zara and Alfred, I know what went wrong and what not to do or accept from this point forward. It starts with self love, which I admit I’m pretty good at these days. Then, even when that special person enters my life, I know we have to take our time to get to know each other and give each other the “honor, esteem and respect” we both deserve. — Carlease B.

Thank you Zara Green and Alfred Edmond Jr. Your book, Loving In The Grown Zone is an indispensable guide to the territory of being Grown. Certain principles really resonate with me: ‘Time is always your friend in relationships. Require others to prove worthy of access to your body, heart, money and home—no matter how long it takes.’ Up until now, I have often believed that I should take care of other people just because they have problems or needs. I’ve now started to act in congruence with the knowledge that Grown relationships are all about equality and reciprocity. Your book has been an invaluable help to me in this process. — Anita G.

Being a young man, single, with no kids and engaged twice would cause some to assume a “what is wrong with me?” type of attitude. But after reading Loving in the Grown Zone, my eyes were open to some of the areas I needed to address as a man. I addressed the issues I had with my father and issues within myself that prompted me to enter unhealthy relationships. Alfred and Zara are so transparent about their mistakes, their ups and downs, to the point it seems unreal for someone to be so open about their past. I could go on and on, but learning to love myself and understanding that I am deserving of receiving love was one of the biggest lessons I learned. Many men don’t know they’re deserving of receiving because we have been programmed to give and provide. — Jay B.